Mom, Dad,

It’s not that easy for me to write you this letter. I think really hard to find my words or not to cry while writing this. I know we are going through hard times these months. Firstly because of our money issues, but also because of my studies. As you know, it’s the third time in a row I fail my semester in two years. All my work is not enough. I can’t concentrate properly. I’m not confident enough during the final exams. As a result I still fail, even if I stay 8 hours per day in front of my desk. I promise you I do everything I can, but it’s not easy at all.

Do you remember last evening when we talked about the aftermath of my bachelor’s degree? I know you remember it and I won’t forget at all how you talked about my “lack of intelligence“ or my “laziness“ just because of my exam results. But I think the problem is somewhere else. It’s been two years I’m at university and I still don’t have any of my semesters. It’s not normal, but I know what’s wrong. After my French baccalaureate, I chose to go a scientific curriculum as you always wanted me to do. The family is full of doctors. Dad, you got a doctorate in quantum physics. Mom, you are a nurse. Grandma and grandpa are lecturers. My elder brother is in civil engineering. My future was already written – well… I thought it was. Today I’m unhappy, I’m not fulfilled because I am in a program that doesn’t suit me at all.

If I write this letter to you today, it’s to announce you that I give up my scientific studies to study languages. I know that you don’t want me to do that because it’ll broke the family reputation, but I prefer to be seen as the black sheep than being unhappy for the rest of my life. I obviously know that talking about it in real life wouldn’t be simple, but I just want you to let me be free with regard to my studies. I don’t find interest anymore through sciences, I’m lost and I don’t know what I would like to do later. Languages are like an evidence for me – people are open-minded, there’s rarely wrong answers because we can analyse something in a thousand ways. What was my favourite activity when I was a kid? Reading and writing. We do the same here! This field is really for me, I perfectly know it. And contrary to sciences, I have a concrete career plan – I would like to complete a PhD in order to teach literature at the university level as a lecturer. It’s as hard as sciences I think, and I would like you to be kind and proud of me, even if I’m not as scientific as y’all. It’s a job like the others, I will be able to earn money and I promise I’ll have a job after these huge studies.

I would like you to accept my schemes once in a life time, and take time to pay interest to my passions and what I like to do. It’s not because I’m not like you that I’m not able to do great things too. So please, let me change direction to practice what really passionates me in order to finally feel fulfilled and happy. Literature and languages are also a science. It’s just a really different science.

Love you.

Cassie <3